Is it irony like Alanis sang about or the real thing?

This is what I’m wondering. Because here is what happens every Tuesday night when I sit down to watch “The Biggest Loser”:

I promptly put something sweet, salty, sugary or otherwise fattening in my mouth.

For pretty much the entire duration of that night’s episode.

Irony or hypocrisy? I’m tempted to call it sabotage but it’s clearly not getting me any closer to where I would like to be this summer. I don’t have any drastic weight goals. It’s not like I’d like to be Nicole Richie. But looking something like Sara Evans wouldn’t hurt.

I like Sara. She’s managed to stay gorgeous, curvy and healthy all while dealing with an ample bosom. We’ll just call that my own unique role model.

Also, she has clearly invested in a good bra. Let’s not underestimate the importance of a good undergarment.

But I digress. Really I’d like nothing more than to get back to what I weighed on my wedding day. It was a good number, a reasonable number. More than the number itself (and perhaps even better) I felt healthy and strong. My word, it would be nice to feel that way again.

I’d like to start running again. To feel the strength that it offers me, to set and accomplish a running goal, to have something about which I can write on that other blog of mine.

And best of all, I want to reclaim my honeymoon trousseau.

I think this is the biggest goal of all- to wear all the cute summery clothes that I picked so carefully and excitedly three years ago instead of buying a whole new summer wardrobe for this year. I’m pretty sure this will please my sweet love’s eyes as well as his fiscally responsible heart.

I’ll keep you posted. Anyone want to come restock my pantry with things that won’t tempt me?